New Year’s thoughts

I  hope everyone had a meaningful Yom Kippur!  For us it was great – my older four kids spent all day at shul (except when dh sent dd13 home in the late afternoon to check on me, and then sent ds10 home around 6 pm for the same reason).  Dd8 and ds7 were amazing – they kept everything running beautifully and I basically sat in the recliner and nursed the baby all day!

(Note – my home computer is down so I might not be able to post as regularly until it’s fixed – hopefully it will be quickly and easily taken care of.  I’ll also have to delay announcing and setting up the new blog, but it won’t be long!)

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking this last week about personal growth.  My breathing difficulties have been a wonderful health opportunity, and I’m looking at changing how I’m spending my time in several ways. 

I’m coming to think that most physical problems begin with an energetic/emotional block.  I read a book by Louise Hay called You Can Heal Your Life, and she correlates various physical problems with the emotional blocks.  Interestingly, what she wrote was what my chiro said about the breathing issues.

What I’d like to work on regarding this ties in with a lot of what I’ve been thinking about – where my energies are best spent and where they’re frittered away.  I recognize that in the name of being responsible, I’ve spent too much time reading the (negative) news online, and that’s making me less positive, less trusting, and more fearful.  That’s not the kind of person I want to be but if I keep spending my time reading negative things, it’s going to continue to influence me.  So first of all, I’m not going to be frequenting a couple of my daily sites that I get news from. 

Secondly, I don’t leave enough space in my life for quiet time for myself, where I can meditate, think deeply, or just breathe.  I tend to feel like I have to DO something.  Yes, I rest, but it’s not a purposeful connect with myself kind of resting.  So the next thing is to consciously take time to spiritually and emotionally ground myself.  During that time, I plan to do affirmations, writing, and reading, in addition to whatever else I do.  I’d like to do this is the early morning but will do it before bed if that’s when I find the time – I’m not making rules about this.

Lastly, I’m going to try to emotionally release the need to be in control.  That’s a much more subtle thing and it can even look positive on the outside, but it’s not good for me.  I can’t control the world, other people, or my family members.  I can just work on myself, and that’s where I want to stay focused.

What are your thoughts/plans on how to make this year even better than the past?

Avivah

3 thoughts on “New Year’s thoughts

  1. I just intend, please G-d, to do that much extra in every area of my living and being. I see it as if we are given to build ourselves throughout our lives, and with each new year a new floor must be added to that building. Another year from Hashem – another level from me. If I can be that much kinder and wiser, that much more considerate, attentive and understanding towards others; more diligent and inspired in my mitzvos observance, and just in general be that much a better person, wife, mother and daughter and friend, then I would regard it a happy and successful year. :)

  2. I agree – that would be an amazing year of growth! I find that when I make it clear in what ways I want to improve, I do better than if I have general goals of being better – because I can’t tell if I’ve improved if I don’t set specific goals.

  3. True! Concrete goals are absolutely vital or else I also find it doesn’t work. What I do is make a chart of 13 middot I have to work on during the year. I honestly sit down and identify my faults and weaknesses and then fill out parts of the chart (it’s actually a number of charts for daily cheshbon hanefesh). I leave 4-5 middot blank for my DH to come up with for me – he knows only too well what I really should be working on and improving. (We do a similar chart for him too, where I also get to point out his weaknesses – a true chance to flex my ezer k’negdo muscles :).) A couple of middot I also ask my mother to fill out for me (my father is niftar). Knowing that at the end of the day I have to give account not only to myself and Hashem, but to DH and mum, keeps me responsible and well motivated. I hate disappointing others.:)

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