Accompanying dd18 to orthopedist and police station

I spent a long day in Jerusalem yesterday, beginning with the bus ride there at 6 am.  I really could have taken a bus an hour later and gotten there with plenty of time to spare but dd19 was going on the earliest bus so I took the chance for some extra time with her and the only cost was waking up an hour earlier!

The purpose of my visit was to accompany dd18 to the orthopedist to check on how her bone is healing.  When I told dd I was planning to come with her to the appointment, she told me it was ridiculous for me to come all the way to Jerusalem for a five minute doctor’s appointment.  (She knows what’s involved time and energy-wise for me to make the trip to Jerusalem – it’s a full day of traveling.)  I told her that I wasn’t asking her opinion about if it was a wise thing to do, just letting her know I’d be there!

When we got to the orthopedist’s office, he spent less than a minute looking at her arm before telling us the bone was healing straight.  Then he spent the next few minutes of our visit on the phone, during which I joked with dd that she was very generous when she had estimated she’d have a five minute visit!

We stayed in the clinic for quite a bit longer since I wanted to get dd’s cast replaced since it had been put on quite loosely, they had then sawed it open at the top along the length (maybe they had a concern about her arm swelling?) and it was beginning to break after just a week.  The orthopedist said it wasn’t necessary, it just needed to be repaired and referred us to the nurse to have it taken care of.  When we got there, the nurse took a look and when I told him it was supposed to be repaired, asked which doctor we spoke to and went to go speak to him.  The nurse came back and said the doctor said to replace it.

Hmm.  Well, it’s what I wanted so no complaints there.  Then he told us we had two choices for a new cast – the traditional cast, or one that would be lighter, thinner (to more easily fit under clothing) and waterproof.  I asked him what the downside of the second cast would be since it seemed like an obvious choice, and he told me we’d have to pay extra for that cast.  Naturally.

It was worth it to me to spend the money if it meant dd would be a bit more comfortable and so he gave her the new cast, which is made of a material that became available just a year ago.

Then we headed to the police station to file the paperwork from the hospital.  I anticipated this would be a very quick errand but was totally wrong – we were there for over two hours.  Some of that was waiting for an investigator to be available and most of it was going over the accident in detail, repeatedly being asked the same questions again and again.  (And after all of that, tonight dd18 called to say that the investigator who came to the scene of the accident right after it happened – someone different than she spoke to at the station- said he has a couple more questions and he wants her to go back in to the station to answer them.)   After this she was giving an authorization form to give the hospital so that we aren’t financially responsible for the ambulance and hospital costs incurred as a result of the accident – the insurance of the car that hit her will cover it.

As a result of the long time we spent at the police station, I ended up taking a bus home three hours later than I originally planned, and got home at 7:45 pm but it was worth it to be there with dd18.  Yes, she could have done everything herself and she would have.  But she went through much too much having to take care of herself after being hit by a car.  I had some peace of mind at the time that she was being taken by ambulance and assumed that meant she would be looked after.  I was wrong about that.

She was taken to the emergency room and left in the waiting room until they opened at 8 am (there’s the second emergency room that’s open 24/7 where they took the other man in the ambulance who was hit by the same car and injured more seriously), then sent back and forth between different departments to get xrays, then a cast, then back to the original department again. No one accompanied her, pushed her in a wheelchair, nothing.  I was aghast and so upset when she told me about this two days later.  I’m very grateful to the young lady who got to the hospital to be with her as fast as she could, but she got there just a short time before dd was released so dd was on her own almost the entire time.

Dd18 commented when we were at the clinic where the orthopedist was, “It’s very hard to get anyone’s attention in places like these.”  She’s right, it is.  That’s why you need someone to be there to advocate for you, because when you’re in pain and especially when in a state of emotional trauma and can hardly process what people are saying, you shouldn’t have to do these things for yourself.

It was a full day and I always find a visit to Jerusalem exhausting, so today was a slower than usual day.  Tomorrow I’ll be going to Jerusalem again for something I had planned before dd had this appointment – actually, my end destination is Ramat Beit Shemesh, so I’ll be taking a bus from Jerusalem to there.  II’m looking forward to joining some homeschoolers at their weekly meetup there!


2 thoughts on “Accompanying dd18 to orthopedist and police station

  1. I’m so glad you went to do this with her. Indeed, no one should ever be in a hospital without a strong advocate, and the advocate needs to also take good care of themselves because the bureaucracy and “facelessness” of the experience is extremely wearing, even without adding in traveling from a distance.

    And yes, the police is another huge bureaucracy and dealing with any sort of form or paperwork with them is usually very time consuming and wearing in its own way.

    Hoping both you and your daughter find time to rest, find sunlight and drink a lot of fluids over the coming week – be kind to yourselves!!

  2. Happy to see your daughters doing better. May I ask how you keep your house functioning while you leave for those long day trips. Housekeeping wise and homeschooling wise. .. Any tips are helpful:)

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