>>I’m curious why the graduation ceremony is such a big deal in your family? I was homeschooled one year and because of that, got my diploma through North Atlantic Regional Schools, which gave me credit for my homeschooled years plus my schooled years. There was a graduation, but I never bothered to go, and don’t feel I missed out in the slightest. School graduations I sort of get the point of, because you’re saying goodbye to classmates and friends who you learned with for 4 years or longer and going your separate ways, but for a homeschooled kid?  This isn’t meant as a criticism in any way, I just am not able to wrap my head around the whole idea of a graduation being a big deal.<<

Well, we’re not participating in the graduation as a cost-cutting measure, that’s for sure! 😆

My view of graduations is that they are to mark the academic accomplishment of reaching a particular goal (eg, 8th grade, high school, Bachelors, Masters, etc), not to say goodbye to friends.  That’s what graduation parties are for!  None of us (me or my friends way back in high school) ever thought of the official graduation ceremony as anything social.

So I see several reasons to participate in this particular graduation ceremony for my oldest two children.  One is that my kids have accomplished what every other graduating senior has and they deserve to be acknowledged for that.  Their education isn’t less valuable or noteworthy because it took place at home, and though they won’t value what they’ve done more or less because of the official ceremony, others will.  Actually, maybe seeing the values others place on it will positively affect their view of themselves; I don’t know.

Children don’t complete their education in a void.  My inlaws are wonderful people but have not been encouraging or supportive of home education, and because my fil was a teacher, it’s been particularly challenging for him to understand my more relaxed and integrated approach.  They’ve been concerned our children wouldn’t get a good education or be prepared for life, because homeschooling was so foreign a concept to them.  When we told them about the graduation, they were thrilled – there was finally something they recognized and valued.  It’s the first educational thing we’ve shared with them in all these years that they feel good about.

I could talk until I’m blue in the face about all the kids have done and accomplished over the years and it would be meaningless to them – I just wouldn’t be speaking their language.  The quality of my children’s education hasn’t been changed by having an official graduation ceremony, but it’s being marked in a way that my inlaws understand.  So in large part we’re doing this because it’s important to the grandparents, and by extension, positively affects their perception of their grandchildren and their abilities.  And even for parents who are strongly supportive (like my mother), it gives them a chance to have additional joy and pride in their grandchild/ren.

But I’m not doing it just to make grandparents happy – while it’s a factor, it’s not the only factor.  The ceremony will be in historic Gettysburg and it will be a bit different than the typical graduation.  I think it will be enjoyable and a nice memory to look back on!

My dd13 has said she doesn’t think she wants a ceremony like this, and I told her that’s fine.  There are many ways to commemorate a special event, and when we get to that stage, we’ll discuss with her what she would like.

Avivah