We are so happy to be home from the hospital!

Yirmiyahu is doing really well though he’s not quite back to himself and he has a very large incision that is still healing.  He also has a stent that will need to be removed in a few weeks under general anesthesia with another (shorter) hospital stay.

Prior to this surgery, we had to do a number of preliminary tests to determine if the surgery was necessary.  These were painful and invasive tests for Yirmiyahu, and he’s become so afraid of what will be done to him that even a simple blood test requires three adults to hold him down.

When got to the hospital the morning of the surgery the admitting nurses noticed he had an eye infection.  I told them we were treating it with a medicated cream recommended by our pediatrician, and they went on to insert the iv for the surgery.  Only one parent was allowed to be in the room with him for that and thankfully it wasn’t me.  I waited at the end of the hallway and clearly heard him screaming from that distance.

When we got to the surgical meeting right before the surgery, the nurse took one look at his eye and said the surgeon isn’t going to approve the surgery with the eye infection. I explained to her that several nurses had checked him, I explained that he got the infection as a result of his immune system being wiped out by the preparatory antibiotics (this same thing happened last time he was scheduled for this surgery) and I explained if they pushed off the surgery, he was likely to once again get sick due to the antibiotics.  She repeated she doubted the surgeon would do the surgery that day and it would probably have to be pushed off for another time.

By this time Yirmiyahu had been fasting from food since the night before and even water for hours and had gone through a very traumatic morning.  I was totally resistant to the idea that he would have to go through this again if it were pushed off.  I began thinking of how strongly I was going to let them know how unacceptable this was, but as these frustrated and resistant thoughts were flooding my mind, a voice of sanity whispered to me, “G-d’s timing is always perfect.”

Ah, the gift of the inner voice!

This tiny thought was hugely helpful.  I was able to recenter myself and stay calm while waiting for the surgeon’s decision, rather than be filled with tension and resentment.  I made peace with the thought we’d have to delay the surgery and focused on gratitude for a caring staff who just like me, want the best for my child.  In the end, the surgeon said that the eye infection wasn’t a reason to delay surgery unless I wanted to – which of course I didn’t – and the surgery took place as planned.

When Yirmi came out of surgery, he was placed in the immediate observation area for post surgical patients.  This is where the nurses basically watch the patient non-stop before transferring them to their perspective wards.  Yirmiyahu’s oxygen was dipping dangerously low when he cried and they kept us in this area for additional time for it to stabilize.

This was a very emotional and sensitive time for Yirmi and for us.  He looked terrible when he came out surgery and I think I cried for the first hour while I was holding him.  At the end of this time my husband, sitting right next to me, got a call.  I heard him ask, “How much is it bleeding?  How deep is it?”  This prompted less than relaxed comments from me, asking him urgently, “What happened?  WHAT happened???”

The call was from dd19 who was home watching the younger boys.  Ds6 had gotten a deep cut on his head and it looked like he would need stitches.  Of course this happened at this point, not when one of us was at home, not even after Yirmi was transferred to the pediatric surgical ward and we were allowed to use the phone!   An injury like this isn’t exactly a common occurrence in our home – in the last 22 years only two of our children have needed stitches and the last time was ten years ago.  And now for the third time it happened at this very sensitive moment.  I had to inwardly wryly smile at the juxtaposition of things happening.  I wouldn’t have planned it like this.  But, I reminded myself, G-d’s timing is always perfect.

Then we came home from the hospital- to a house of several sick children.  The first virus of the season came sweeping through and of course it happened now.  It hasn’t been fun or easy being back home.  Perfect timing, right?

Right.

Seriously.

By now you know what I told myself, right?

“G-d’s timing is perfect!”

However it is right now is the way it’s supposed to be at this moment.  And if that’s how it is, it’s from G-d.  And if it’s from G-d, it’s for my ultimate good.

This thought has helped me so many times with the little and bigger irritations of daily living.  I hope it helps you, too!

Avivah