Changes for more enjoyable Shabbos prep

Today I did some housecleaning on the blog – I’ve been overwhelmed by hundreds of spam posts by AI bots. I found that in the midst of those of almost 500 in the last month that still weren’t deleted were about fifteen legitimate comments from the last couple of years that I didn’t see and therefore didn’t approve. If you commented at some point and thought you were being ignored, please know that it wasn’t intentional, but a matter of falling through the digital cracks.

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Today (Thursday) I’m doing the bulk of my Shabbos cooking. I usually do most of my cooking on Friday, but am shifting my schedule after a conversation with my husband and sixteen y ear old son.

Our almost 18 year old is now living in the yeshiva dorm and will only be home every few weeks for Shabbos. Every time someone moves out, the logistics in the home shift and we discussed what would make our Shabbos more enjoyable.

We began by discussing erev Shabbos preparations, since that affects how you go into Shabbos.

We agreed we’d all like to be ready earlier – we’re usually almost ready a couple of hours before Shabbos, but that bit that isn’t quite done keeps us from feeling completely able to relax. We don’t like the feeling of work that goes on and on. We would all like to take a nap in the afternoon, so that we aren’t tired by the time we begin our meal after 8 pm.

Friday is the only day that my son and husband are both available to do things around the house. Those tasks get done at a slow pace, because they both help in the kitchen. I recognized that I’m less appreciative of this assistance than I generally am of the things they do, because what I really want is for them to knock out the ever growing list of home repairs.

Here’s the plan we worked out together:

I’ll switch my cooking day to Thursday, leaving Friday for soup and fresh salads. Last night I did a shopping trip that I usually would have done this morning, so that I would have an uninterrupted block of time for cooking today.

I’ve always preferred to bake challah on Fridays so it’s fresh, but now I’ll bake it in advance and wrap it well before freezing it. I’ve found when I do that, it’s still tastes very fresh when defrosted.

Last week I made a double batch of challah dough and froze half of it, so I defrosted the dough last night. I was able to shape the dough into challahs when I got up at 5 am. They rose while I got the kids ready for school and the freshly baked challahs were in the freezer by 10 am. That was nice to have done.

I’ve made the meat and chicken, and as soon as I finish writing this, will prepare a pan of potatoes and sweet potatoes, then bake them all at once while I take a nap.

My plan is to have all the laundry washed and hung up in time for it to dry by Thursday evening, so I don’t need to deal with any laundry on Friday. I have one load of whites in the washer right now, and then maybe I’ll do a small load of towels, but otherwise all of the laundry was done yesterday.

My son and husband will do the cleaning on Thursday night, so we’ll all wake up to a house that is ready for Shabbos. Just as I preferred freshly baked challahs on Friday, my eighteen year old son preferred freshly mopped floors on Friday afternoons. He was the one doing the mopping, so that was his schedule.

Now with his job shifting to someone else, the mopping will be done in advance, with a quick damp wipe of the floors an hour before Shabbos.

Instead of helping in the kitchen, my husband and son will have a set time for home repairs/projects, on Friday from 10 am – 1 pm. 1 pm is the hard stop time; they will be completely finished before or by 1 pm. None of us want to finish all we need to do early, and then fill our time with more tasks.

All of the youngest four kids are home by 1. Once they get home, we’ll all have quiet time (this was our routine every day of the summer) so that everyone will be able to rest and feel fresh by the time Shabbos begins.

It’s helpful to periodically reassess what is working well in your home and what isn’t. Our previous schedule was working well for a long time for all of us and it was still okay, but we realized we could all feel more of a sense of accomplishment, connection and relaxation by making these changes.

Have you changed how you’ve done things for a long time to make it better? What did you do differently?

Avivah

Comments

7 responses to “Changes for more enjoyable Shabbos prep”

  1. Rivka Avatar
    Rivka

    We recently made a change. I aim to get lunch and supper ready within the first few hours of the morning.
    With young kids who need consistence with their mealtimes, this was a big improvement, especially since we homeschool.

    I’m curious if you could share how you wrap your challahs to keep them fresh.
    Thanks, Avivah!

    1. Avivah Avatar
      Avivah

      That’s great, Rivka! I don’t always get meals made early in the day, but I think it’s ideal and I want to do more of that this year. It’s great for mealtimes being regularly, and also it takes the niggling thought about what to do and when to do it off of your head for the rest of the day.

      As far as wrapping challahs – I’m doing something different than I’ve done in the past, since my mother bought a roll of plastic wrap for the bar mitzva. It’s not something I ever use, but now I am wrapping them tightly in that once cool. It’s working out well right now, but it’s not something I expect to continue once this is used up. Previously, I used recycled bread bags (I save the bags I buy sliced bread in), pulling them tightly around the challahs so as much air as possible is out, and then closing it up.

  2. rachelli Avatar
    rachelli

    With Friday’s getting shorter I start cooking Thursday. After Pesach it goes back to Friday’s . Short Friday’s I try also not to have to do any shopping if possible. My mindset is, whatever I can do earlier in the week, do.

    1. Avivah Avatar
      Avivah

      Thank you, Rachelli!

  3. Shani Avatar
    Shani

    Aviva, can you please share ideas what to do with the children on Fridays between 12 pm and 7 pm?

    I have 90% of shabbos cooking and cleaning done by Thurs night (all cooked food is usually ready on Thursday, & Friday is usually just the cholent, fresh salads, & a cake) but the floor gets dirty again on Friday afternoon with the crumbs and chatifim/candies the kids bring from gan/school (somehow it gets all over! Last week my daughter brought a sticky leaky shluk… was amazed at what a mess such a tiny shluk can make)
    I find occupying the children to be the biggest challenge on erev Shabbos!
    By us the boredom leads to fighting… which just causes tension and frustration pre-Shabbos. So far the only ideas I have for them is to bake a cake, cut toilet paper, and I put a few in charge of simple cleaning tasks. All that in total takes less than an hour to do!
    Unfortunately none of them are interested in resting… (5 kids ages 3-13)

    1. Avivah Avatar
      Avivah

      This is an issue that I’m thinking about but haven’t yet created a structure for. Usually they’re antsy and bothering each other more than usual since I’m less available when busy with preparations (though I do involve them in cooking and that’s always helpful for them, though for me less so). I also take dd8 for therapy on Friday afternoons. I’ve talked with my husband about taking them out for a short outing, but as I said, we’re still in process with this. I would like it to be more of a nice day for them and for that to happen, they need to know what to expect and to be involved.

    2. Avivah Avatar
      Avivah

      I forgot to add that none of my children are interested in resting, but I’ve made that a non-negotiable since I’m interested in resting. 🙂 I put that onto our schedule for the summer since they really need some quiet time to decompress. Even though they didn’t like it and protested very, very verbally, after a few days they didn’t do much more than say they don’t like having quiet time (often not even that), and then would go to their rooms.

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