About six weeks ago, I took Facebook off my phone, inspired by a documentary I didn’t yet watch – The Social Dilemma – and a couple of others that I did watch when I was searching for the first. I looked at my online usage and asked myself how much value it was adding to my life.
Very little.
In fact, I can definitively point to when I joined Facebook several years ago as the time that I ‘lost my voice’. I’ve always been a strong proponent of standing up for your beliefs and being willing to say what needs to be said, with your name attached.
And then I joined Facebook, with the intention of increase the outreach of my blog and my services as a parenting consultant.
Almost immediately I felt different. Everyone was sharing their opinions, almost always in a very short and superficial way. And there was so much criticism and harshness and judgment. Despite years of blogging publicly, my desire to communicate online shrank dramatically.
Whenever I had a technical issue that limited my computer usage, I noticed within a day or two that I felt significantly more relaxed and present. And each time the issue would be resolved, I felt almost disappointed to go back to my regular online use. I’ve shared about that experience here.
Back to six weeks ago. I use my laptop very irregularly these days, and knew that when I had time on the laptop, it would be very limited and it would be much easier to moderate the time spent on Facebook than on my phone. So it was off my phone and that translated to very minimal social media usage.
It has been so good. I periodically jump on, check in on my gardening group, say congratulations to a person or two, and get off. It’s great.
I’ve watched Facebook becoming increasingly regulatory of the content allowed. My own personal development path has led me to work very, very much on releasing control and shifting to building relationship and trusting the good intention of others. I strongly disagree with attempting to control others on every level: as a parent, in marriage, in communities, and on a national and international political level. The social media attempts to control conversations is inherently disrespectful and dysfunctional.
Additionally, I’ve read a lot of history, particularly about Soviet Russia and World War II/ Nazi Germany. Censorship of this sort hasn’t been part of the good side of history (to put it mildly) and is deeply concerning.
When I made the decision to dramatically shift away from Facebook (and again now when making the decision to completely jump ship) it initially felt intimidating to step away from because when you’re online, it feels like a part of your real world.
But you know what?
It’s really not. Your online world is very much not real life, and when you get away from it a bit, that becomes so clear.
There are undoubtedly some helpful aspects – several of my groups have been a wonderful source of information. But it’s been very freeing to be so independent of the views and emotions of others, not to see the latest news or the attacks on our fellow humans…the world feels so much more hopeful and beautiful.
Each of us has the same twenty four hours in a day. How do you want to spend them? What makes your life feel meaningful and productive? What makes you feel most content inside yourself?
I want to live consciously and that means choosing what comes into my life consciously. I want to live in alignment with my beliefs, not to short-sell myself for the paltry conveniences offered in exchange for my time and life energy. So I’m choosing to delete my social media accounts – since Facebook has purchased WhatsApp, I’ll be closing my account on both platforms.
Of course, I’ll still be here!
Avivah
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