Avivah Werner

Category: Intentional Spending

  • Our free chicken coop

    I started incubating duck eggs on Thursday night, and I’ll put the chicken eggs in this coming Thursday night; that way all the eggs should hatch about the same time.  Then we’ll decide if we want to keep any of them, and which we’d keep (ie, the ducklings or chicks – still a good amount of debate about that and I think it will depend on what kind of ducklings hatch out).

    For quite some time I’ve been keeping an eye out for possible frugal housing options for them once they are hatched, assuming we decide to keep 3 or 4 for pets/eggs.  But one big thing holding me back was the limited time to put together some housing without spending much money on it.

    This morning, my ds11 came home and told me he saw that someone put out a sturdy wood dog house for free and thought it would be just the right size for a coop.  I took a walk with my dd13 to go look at it, and he was right – it was just right.  Big enough for the amount of birds we’re considering, but compact enough to not be a major presence in my yard.

    But dh had taken the van to work, and what would usually be a quick and easy jaunt to pick this up wasn’t.  It was HEAVY.  Dd and I started carrying it, but after just a couple of minutes, I sent her home to bring back reinforcements (ie the muscles of some other children :)).  Since ds16 was at shul (synagogue), dd15 was davening (praying), ds11 was at piano lessons – so the only muscle was from dd9 and ds7.  Not quite the muscle I was envisioning.

    But they did great and we got the doghouse home with a good amount of effort, laughing most of the way at how ridiculous we probably looked to people driving by.  We’ll have to make some adaptations to it – namely, to put in a perch for roosting, nesting boxes for egg laying, and to make the roof hinged so we can open it from the top easily for cleaning.  But the frame and size are good, and I think that’s doable. I also like that it doesn’t look like a chicken coop.

    Having this housing at least partially taken care of is one more thing that I don’t need to think about, and having it means that it’s looking a lot more likely that we’ll end up keeping some.  We still need to put a fence around our entire property – not a small project at all – but I have a new friend in the area who is enthusiastic about doing this as a team effort.  If she has anything to say about it, I’ll have a fence up before you know it, lol!

    I still have several weeks before anything will be hatching, and then it will be at least two more weeks before I’d think of transferring them outside – so about 5.5 weeks until I need to have everything in place.  So while it doesn’t feel very urgent, time has a way of going very, very fast, particularly when you’re busy with lots of other things (which I am).  I know that if I don’t think about this now, there’s no way we’ll be ready to deal with everything later on.

    Wasn’t that a great find?

    Avivah

  • Pesach 2010 food shopping list

    Every month I spend approximately $600 on groceries for our family of 11, and this month has been no different, including all extra Passover food expenses.   This year I’ve accomplished that by firstly spending about 50% less than usual last month, using up pantry items so I didn’t need to buy as much as usual, then using the extra $300 to buy matza, six cases of grape juice, and ground meat.  That split up the large expenses so that it didn’t need to come out of one month’s budget, and everything else was able to be purchased this month.

    You’ll notice when looking at my list that I don’t buy a lot of prepared or processed foods.  I did buy mayonnaise for Passover even though we usually make it from scratch – I don’t have a blender set aside for Passover use that I can make it with.  And though I was planning not to buy any sugar at all and to stick with honey (during the year I use sucanat and honey, no white sugar at all), my kids pleaded with me to buy some so that they can make our annual strawberry ice whip recipe.  Otherwise most of our groceries are ingredients in the unprocessed state.

    Since I bought the bulk of the groceries for the entire month, what I’ve bought is intended to last through the middle of April, not just the week of Passover.  (I have money remaining to buy more vegetables, once tomorrow and then again in two weeks.)  Here’s my list of basic ingredients, amounts, and prices I paid:

    • 70 lb chicken wings – .99 lb
    • 30 lb ground meat – 3.49 lb
    • 3 lb chicken cutlets – 3.79 lb
    • 3 lb fresh beef tongue – 12.59 lb
    • 20 lb raw beef liver – 2.99 lb
    • 6 lb shredded mozzarella cheese – $4.99 lb
    • 4- 8 oz farmer cheese – (rubbed out on receipt, I think it was something like 2.99 each)
    • 40 dozen pastured eggs – 24 dozen for 1.60 dozen/16 dozen for 1.25 dozen – from two different farmers (these were my lowest prices yet and I was quite pleased!)
    • 7 gallons raw milk
    • 100 lb potatoes – 9.95/50 lb
    • 80 lb yams – 13.50/40 lb
    • 50 lb onions – 30.50 (last month I paid $14 for 50 lb – when I asked why the big jump I was told the hurricane in Chile drove up a lot of produce prices)
    • 30 lb carrots – 2.99/5 lb (will need at least 50 lb more)
    • 3 pkg romaine hearts – 2.29 each
    • 1 case grapefruit (40 ct) – 15.50
    • 1 case navel oranges (88 ct) – 18.75
    • 20 lb clementines – 3.99/5 lb
    • 10 fresh pineapples – 1.29 each
    • 40 lb apples – .33 lb
    • 45 lb frozen berries – 2.49/3 lb
    • 4 lb fresh strawberries – 3 lb/$5
    • 18 lb. cabbage – .39 lb
    • 5 heads celery – .69 each
    • 8 heads cauliflower – .99 each
    • 3 calabaza squash – 1.49 each
    • 3.5 lb sliced baby portabello mushrooms – .69/8 oz
    • horseradish root – .80
    • 1 pkg garlic – .99
    • 10 lb cucumbers – .99 lb
    • 4 lb red peppers – 1.99 lb
    • extra virgin olive oil – 8.99 (3)
    • 1 small jar mayonnaise 3.19
    • honey – 5.29
    • 5 lb white sugar – 2.99
    • 1 container raisins – 3.65 (plus have 30 lb I bought six weeks ago)
    • 2 cans pickles – 1.39 each
    • 2 cans crushed pineapple – 1.29 each
    • 2 cans sliced green olives – 2.89 each
    • 2 cans sliced black olives – 2.89 each
    • 2 bottles lemon juice – 1.79 each
    • 1 small jar apple cider vinegar (this part of receipt is faded – was under $2, though)
    • 5 lb hand shmura matza – 16.99 lb
    • 1 lb hand shmura spelt matza – 25.99 lb
    • 3 lb organic spelt machine matza – 3.29 lb
    • 6 lb machine shmura matza – 5.99 lb
    • 1 lb matza farfel – left from last year, I think someone gave it to us
    • potato starch – .50 each (bought after Pesach last year)
    • matza meal – .50 each (bought after Pesach last year)
    • (4) 6 oz pkg ground walnuts – 1.99 each

    bulk purchases:

    • grape juice – 2.50 bottle (this was 50% off the regular price so I bought 48 bottles in order to have enough until the fall when it goes on sale again – I can’t bear paying full price!)
    • 25 lb sliced almonds – 102.67
    • 25 lb raw cashews – 67

    The quinoa I  ordered didn’t end up coming in, so I decided to do without it for Pesach – I just bought 25 lb last month and since when I got it, transferred it by pouring directly into a clean bag in a clean bucket (and it’s stayed closed since I haven’t yet used it),  I do have the option to use it for Passover.

    I didn’t buy any butter or extra virgin coconut oil because it’s so expensive; instead I’ve rendered a huge amount of beef fat for tallow (which I got free from a butcher – chicken fat is suddenly in demand this time of year and expensive but I guess using beef fat is beyond the pale, lol!) and will use that for most cooking during Passover.  I’ve used rendered beef fat and cooked with tallow before, but never tried to do without butter or coconut oil!  I’ll use olive oil for salads and to saute anything for dairy meals (though I generally avoid doing any cooking with olive oil since it isn’t heat stable).  We already baked mocha squares with the tallow and though my dd doing the baking was put off at the idea, it turned out great.

    Because my kids prefer chicken wings to any other kind of chicken and they’re so much cheaper than other cuts, it’s a very affordable protein option for us.  This month I decided that since I spent so little on chicken, and there was still room in the budget, that I could for once splurge on fresh beef tongue in honor of the holiday.  My kids love this but it is so outrageously expensive that I haven’t bought any for years. I used to buy it twice a year when I lived on the West Coast, since it would be marked down to about $4 lb after the holidays.  Then I’d put it in my freezer and have it on hand for the next holiday.  It’s hard to look at the very small amount that 3 lb of tongue ($42) makes, though – I’ll have to serve another main dish with it since that alone would be very skimpy!  But all of that notwithstanding, it will be special for the holiday and I know it will be appreciated.

    I still have about 3/4 case of napa cabbage (I bought two cases over a month ago for $7 each).    Despite my efforts to use it all quickly, forty huge heads of napa is a lot to use!  In order to keep it fresh, I wrapped each head of napa in a clean plastic bag, pressing out all the extra air before closing it well.  Now weeks later, they still are fresh and I’ll have plenty to use  in place of lettuce for salads, in addition to having it as a cooked vegetable.

    Tomorrow I’ll do another shopping trip for more fresh vegetables so we’ll be set for the week (we use a lot more of everything during Passover than during a regular week).   Dh wants to start drinking fresh vegetable juices, and fortunately our juicer has never been used (it’s been sitting around for over 2 years now :)) so we can use it for Passover.   For juicing I’ll need even more vegetables than usual.  I’ll probably get a 50 lb bag of carrots, and more cukes, beets, peppers, tomatoes, etc.

    What does your shopping list look like?

    Avivah

  • Bargain clothes shopping

    A couple of days I took a day trip with my oldest kids to do some shopping for apparel. Specifically the oldest three wanted to get shoes and the girls and I needed summer tops.  I had the great idea to take them to an outlet mall, where supposedly prices are much better than at the non-outlet stores for the same brands.  Before we got to the outlet mall, we passed a Goodwill in the neighborhood we were doing our food shopping, and decided to pop in to see if we could find anything suitable.

    Turns out all womens’ cotton knit tops were on sale that week at 2/$5, and the more expensive ones were 2/$10.  You had to have a discount card to get this price, but I figured it was worth $4.25 to buy discount card that I could use for a year – especially since we saved $24 on our first purchase as a result (after the cost of the discount card we saved $19.75).  That was a nice bit of fun shopping, since in addition to saving money on nice shirts (mostly name brand and all good quality – we got 16 tops and a few other items for $55) it saved us the time of having to go in and out of lots of other stores looking for clothes.

    Then we spent a long time in the outlet stores, and all of them were getting more tired and disappointed with the prices and selection as time went on.  I was so glad when my ds16 found a pair of nice shoes at Bass – they were $30 and had been marked down 75% (down from $119).  He was looking for something very specific and was pleased with his purchase; I was pleased that after all of our time in the stores, that someone finally found something they wanted!

    As we drove away, my dd13 said the prices were ‘kind of disappointing’.  I never thought about the situation I’ve created until then – my kids are used to having nice quality clothes, but they’re also used to my very low purchase prices (thanks to careful thrift store shopping, hitting seasonal sales at retail stores, and clothing exchanges with friends).  They aren’t used to spending top dollar for the kind of clothes they’re used to wearing, and they kept saying nothing they were looking at was worth the money.  One of them said, “Now I know why people think having kids is expensive – they must be dressing their kids from head to toe in stores like that!”

    Then as we were driving by just a few minutes later, I noticed another Goodwill and spontaneously asked the kids if they wanted to stop in there.  This Goodwill had something I’ve never seen around here (the Salvation Army in Seattle had something similar, though), a bargain room.  The bargain room (or whatever it was called) was a separate Goodwill store next to the regular Goodwill, where all clothes were put after they hadn’t sold for a given amount of time.  All the prices were low, low, low.  But it wasn’t nicely organized or arranged on racks – you had to hunt through things to find what you wanted. There was nothing wrong with the items themselves, though – I saw some clothing that still had the original retail tags on them.

    Within a minute of walking in, I found galoshes for ds16 – he had literally said five minutes before we walked in that he needs to get galoshes for his new shoes to protect them in rainy weather (since he walks back and forth to shul/synagogue daily, regardless of weather), and these were the perfect fit and style for the dress shoes he bought.  $1.50.  Then he found a really nice pair of shoes of leather shoes in great condition – another $1.50.  🙂  He wore them all day yesterday and said he can’t believe it, but he likes them as much or maybe even more than the new shoes he got at Bass, that he was VERY happy with.  (Ds has a very nice sense of style and somewhat expensive taste in clothing – which is why he wanted new shoes even though he had two excellent pairs of shoes that I bought him – the style wasn’t ‘just so’.)  Then he found a white dress shirt for .75 and a raincoat for $2.  You might expect that kids would rather shop for new clothes in retail stores because it’s supposedly ‘cooler’; it’s funny but after doing all the shopping we did at the outlets, all of them appreciated a thrift store like this much more!

    I’m not allowed to tell you what I bought for anyone else because I can’t embarrass my kids by telling you the amazing bargains we found.  😆  Actually, pretend I didn’t mention the above finds at the first Goodwill.  They don’t want their friends scrutinizing their clothes after hearing from their mothers who read this blog and wondering what we got at a thrift store and what we paid retail prices for.  You mothers who tell your kids what you read here should know that you’re seriously limiting my ability to write anything!! 😆 I told them that I highly doubted their friends would be put off that they got so many nice clothes at a fraction of what most of their peers would pay for the same thing, but whatever.

    I guess you can say my kids have officially recognized the value of thrift store shopping for themselves!  It was a fun day and nice to come home laden with our purchases.  Even shopping with fashion-conscious teens doesn’t have to break the bank!

    Avivah

  • Kitchen, check. Now time to relax.

    My kitchen is officially turned over for Passover as of this morning, and I already have a pot of lamb broth simmering on the stove top.   First things first, you know!  The second pot is filled with potatoes.  Naturally.  🙂  Seriously, I find that having boiled potatoes and eggs on hand makes it very easy to deal with hunger for the first day we turn over the kitchen, when we’re not ready to start cooking in earnest.

    Today we have a busy but relaxing day planned.  Today is my ds’s fourth birthday- this year sure has flown by!  Last year we took the family to an outing to the duck pond where we all enjoyed ourselves very much, and ds asked me if we could go again for his birthday.  It’s such perfect timing, being spring weather and a good opportunity to give the ducks any leavened foods that we’re not going to be eating.   We’ll take with us the leavened food that the kids want to eat, too (like organic chocolate covered pretzels that we received for Purim).  I think we might make a trip to the duck pond an annual family tradition for his birthday; it’s the kind of thing that everyone can enjoy looking forward to.

    He also asked if I could buy ice cream sandwiches, which is what I did last year.  Initially I agreed, but then realized that today is Ben and Jerry’s free scoop day, and thought it would be more fun to take the family out for a scoop.  (Here’s a link for their site if you’re interested – you can check the store locator to see what’s in your area if you’re interested – www.benjerry. com.)  No, it’s not a bit healthy!  Yep, call me a nutritional rebel.  😆

    The only Ben and Jerry’s in the city isn’t participating in the free scoop day, though, so we’ll be going to a neighboring city (where my dh works), getting the ice cream there, and then picking dh up from work.  That will be a treat for all of the kids as well as dh since it means a lot more time together and we get him from work infrequently.  Then we’ll all be able to go to the duck pond together and will be back in time for dinner.

    In the summer I got some free items from someone who was downsizing, and saved one to give to ds today.  It’s a beautiful hand painted laquered wood kiddush cup – here’s what it looks like.  Because it’s intended to be used at the Passover seder as the cup of Elijah, it has Eliyahu written on the front in Hebrew.   We already have a cup of Elijah, but since Eliyahu is the name of my ds, it’s perfect for him.  It’s kosher for Passover use, so he’ll use it this year for the seder and then an use it as his regular kiddush cup every Friday night.  I think he’s going to be really excited to be able to have something he associates with being big that is all for him.

    I hope all of you who are preparing for Passover are getting to the point where you can relax and have some fun, too!

    Avivah

  • Chickpea Cheeseburgers

    I made these chickpea cheeseburgers for dinner last night; they were very frugal and very much enjoyed!  For those who are avoiding gluten, they’re also gluten-free.  I served them with sour cream, red pepper strips, and snow peas.  Since everyone enjoyed them and they were very frugal, I thought you’d appreciate if I shared it.  I’ll post my costs at the end.

    As always, I make recipes up as I go along so I’ll try to estimate how much I used of each ingredient as accurately as I can.  This made enough as a main dish for our family of 11, about 50 4-inch burgers; you can either cut it in half (or 1/4!), or make the full recipe and put some in the freezer to use at a another time.

    Chickpea Cheeseburgers

    • 2 lb dried chickpeas,  soaked, sprouted, and cooked
    • 1 large onion or 3 small onions, minced
    • 12 eggs (I used pastured eggs)
    • 1  c. arrowroot flour (if you want it to be gluten-free) or bulgur (cooked with 1 c. water or yogurt – I meant to soak this ahead but forgot)
    • 1 lb mozzarella or cheddar cheese, shredded
    • 5 cloves garlic, minced
    • 3 T. salt
    • pepper to taste

    (If you decide to use bulgur for this recipe as the thickener, start it cooking while you prepare the rest of the mixture.)

    Blend the chickpeas in a food processor until they are somewhat smooth (they don’t have to be pureed, but you want them pretty well broken down).  You’ll probably find it helpful to add some liquid to this so they can blend easily – either water or the juice the chickpeas cooked in is good.  Add in the minced onion, garlic, and eggs.  Mix, then add the shredded cheese and spices.   Mix well, and add either arrowroot powder or cooked bulgur as the thickener.

    Drop onto parchment-lined or greased baking pan into the size you desire.  We made them about 4 – 5 inches across.  Bake at 500 degrees until they are browned, about 10 – 15 minutes (smaller ones will cook faster).  They should stay in a burger form when they’re cooked through – if they’re falling apart, you need to cook it for longer.  Serve warm.

    Here are my costs (remember that I buy almost everything on sale and if I didn’t the costs could be double what I’ve listed – but still would make for an inexpensive dinner!):

    • chickpeas – .59 lb – $1.18 total
    • onion – .28 lb (bought in 50 lb bag) – .28 total (I’m overestimating since one large onion was less an a pound but I prefer to overstate costs than to understate them)
    • eggs – 1.75 dozen – total $1.75
    • organic bulgur – .79 for 24 oz – .20 total
    • mozzarella/cheddar (bought in 5 lb block) – 4.69 lb – $4.69 total
    • garlic – 5 lb peeled organic garlic was $7 – .20 total
    • spices – not significant, but I’ll add another .15 for that

    Total cost for burgers – $8.45 – since this served 9 people (not including dh and baby), it works out to .84 cents per person, and each person had enough for 5 – 6 burgers.  I think that served with more sides, three would have been enough per person.

    The sour cream we served it with was 2.29 for a large container, sliced red peppers were .99 lb and used about 2 lb, and the snow peas were 1.99 lb (used 1 pound).  I meant to chop up a large head of napa cabbage but got busy with something else and forgot about it until halfway through dinner – that would have only been an additional .50 since I bought a case with 20 heads for $7 from the Asian grocery (but we would have ended up eating less of the other things!). So $6.29 total for the add-ons.

    The total cost for the entire meal was $14.61, which works out to $1.62 a person.  Most of our kids have adult appetites, with the exception of the 2 and 3 year olds.  I love figuring out these kinds of things! 🙂

    (This post is part of Slightly Indulgent Tuesdays , Real Food Wednesdays, and Pennywise Platter Thursday.)

    Avivah

  • Clarifying what products need Passover certification

    Have you ever noticed that packaged foods that are certified for Pesach (Passover) are very expensive?  (How’s that for a nicely phrased understatement? 😆 )

    After seeing the prices for some foods I want to use for Pesach that are certified for Passover use, I decided yesterday to get some more information about these foods and if they really need that additional Pesach supervision that I’ve been paying extra for until now.   Although I have a few more items I want to call about tomorrow, the information I’ve learned will help me to buy a number of foods for Pesach at the price I pay year round, and I thought I’d share that with you.  (However, it’s always good to ask your questions yourself.)

    Quinoa – some people don’t use this because of the suspicion of it being kitniyos.  Here in my city it’s accepted across the board that it’s not; I believe it was the local kashrus agency that did the research about if quinoa was kosher for Passover and brought it to public attention.  My previous understanding was that it had to be purchased from one of two sources, both of which were much more expensive than what I can buy it for.  My question was if I could use quinoa from any company or not.  I called the OU (Orthodox Union) Hotline yesterday and was told that as long as it’s purchased in a sealed bag and is checked before Pesach (in case of accidental cross contamination), I can buy from whatever company I want.  That means that I can buy from my usual bulk source and get a 25 lb for under $4 lb instead of paying between $5 – 6 for a 12 oz box.   I had already decided I wasn’t going to use much quinoa if it meant paying over $7 lb – I’d rather buy meat for that price! I use quinoa year round so buying a 25 lb bag isn’t a waste for me, and this means I can use as much as I want for Pesach.

    Nuts – any shelled nuts (ie without shells) that are whole and have no additives or preservatives can be used for Pesach even without certification.  Be sure that there’s no BHA or BHT in the nuts you get.  This is also something I use and buy in bulk year round – since I don’t have any unopened packages I’ll buy new ones for Pesach.  I usually space the expenses of bulk nut purchases so that I don’t buy more than two a month, and since there are four kinds of nuts I’d like to get, this will be a big expense in the coming month for me.  But it will all even out since I won’t have to buy nuts for a long time.  I was told sliced almonds also have this classification, but nut flours don’t.

    Dried fruit – all dried fruit needs to have a special certification for Passover.  The exception to this is raisins that are grown in the US and are certified kosher for year round use.  Since last month I bought a 25 (or 30?) lb box of raisins that meet this criteria and haven’t yet used them, this was good news to me.

    Milk – last year dh asked about this and was told that we needed to use milk certified kosher for Passover.  So I didn’t use any raw milk.  This year I decided to ask for myself since after speaking to dh, I realized the answer was applicable to both pasteurized and raw milk – I thought the answer had been given expressly about raw milk.  I was told that as long as it’s purchased before Pesach, it doesn’t need any Pesach certification. That means that this year we’ll be able to enjoy raw milk on Pesach.

    edited to add – I just called again and was told that organic sucanat is okay (called back a second time and was told it’s not, so won’t be using this after all), as is extra virgin coconut oil (which was also mentioned in the comments section before I made this call).  I asked about unsweetened coconut products but all of those will need Passover certification.  It didn’t hurt to ask, though!

    There are other foods that don’t require certification that I was already aware of – this is by no means an exhaustive list!  These are all new to me, though.

    I’m very pleased with all of this information.  I thought I had no choice but to pay extra for Passover certification on the above items, and am glad to know that I can eat these foods just as affordably for Pesach as I do year round.  And just as nutritiously, too!

    Avivah

  • Explaining money limitations to kids

    >> i am wondering how you deal with money and your kids. as the children get older, there are certain things that they need- and certain things they just really really want- that we just can’t afford. my husband thinks we should tell them our finances- like, “there is only $28 in the bank until the next payday, so we can’t get you x”. that gives me the heebie jeeebies. i think we do a good job of teaching our kids the value of money- so they don’t generally ask for frivolous things.

    i know some people who tell their kids ‘this is just not how we choose to spend our money right now.’ that avoids the kids feeling poor, but i think sometimes it isn’t fair, because it implies that you are choosing to let them do without, when really you wish it could be different. i don’t want my kids to be afraid to need things or to feel like we can’t provide for them or to be complexed about our finances. i would prefer is our finances were none of their business, but as they get older, this gets harder.

    so, i hope you will see through to the main ideas here- giving over god values while being comapssionate, while balancing everyone’s needs.<<

    I decided to ask my kids for their thoughts on this before responding.  So at dinner last week, I told them the question, and asked them what they thought.  There was a long silence and they all looked at me blankly.  Then one of them said, “What do you mean?”  So I explained, “Sometimes we have money limitations and can’t buy you what you want – so how do you feel about that?”  And then they said that that situation has never happened!

    Since we’ve had times of being extremely financially limited, I certainly have had to curtail expenses, so I guess they have selective memories. 🙂  I think they have the feeling of not having been deprived of something because they know the difference between wants and needs.  If they have a need, they know we’ll take care of it.  If they have a want, they realize that even if we have the money, we may not choose to spend it in that way – it has to be something we feel is valuable.   So the focus becomes on what the value of the purchase is, not our finances.

    I feel it’s really important that kids feel secure in their parents’ ability to provide for them.  And this isn’t about how much you make, but the attitude you project.  I remember years ago we were living on a very, very small income – honestly, it was too small and very stressful just trying to pay bills.  Somehow the name Bill Gates came up, and my kids asked who he was.  So I said he was a man who created Microsoft and became very rich.  My oldest son was about 10 or 11 and he asked, “Is he richer than us?”   I said yes, he was even richer than us.  My son said in an awed voice, ‘wow, he must really be rich!” 😆

    I’ve always tried to focus on all that we have, and this is particularly important at times when you really are tight financially.  You can always look at those who have much more than you and feel deprived, or you can look at all of those (most of the world) who don’t have adequate food, shelter, clean water – let alone all the extras we take for granted.  It may sound like something that works to tell a four year old, but none of us are too old to count our blessings.

    If I would tell my kids we have $28 left in the bank or not would depend on if we had a savings account and if it was something that was causing me anxiety.  If I knew that we had some kind of cushion, I’d be very comfortable saying I’d spent the budgeted money for the month and am not willing to buy something with a credit card since I don’t have the money right now; they can see you’re being fiscally responsible and feel secure that you have savings of some sort.  ‘Not now’ is a different message than, ‘never no matter how needy you are’.  I routinely tell my kids that I have $x for food (generally a small number since I spend most of the monthly budget at the very beginning of the month) for the next two or three weeks, but I feel no pressure about it – in fact I enjoy the challenge! – and they know that we’re well stocked so that doesn’t leave them wondering if we’ll go hungry.  I wouldn’t say that if I had an empty pantry and my option was feeding them one meal a day.  If you literally have only $28 in the bank, I would absolutely not say anything about that – you’d be anxious and fearful, and so would your kids. Better to just say you don’t have the money right now.

    I’m comfortable explaining that we have a limited amount of money and we have to make choices.  Everyone has some kind of financial limitation, so I don’t see this as an indication that we’re poor or something unique my kids have to suffer with.  In fact, I see this as an important and positive concept for children to understand, something that many kids (and adults!) nowadays don’t have much of a concept of.

    Sometimes our children need help recognizing when they are making choices that limit what they get.  For example, if you can afford a certain item at a thrift stop this month (obviously in reasonable condition) but have to wait until next month for that item at the mall, and your children insist that only the mall works for them, then it’s not about you depriving them.  It’s about the choices that they’re making.  My kids enjoy going with me to thrift stores since I only buy good quality items in excellent condition, so their association with thrift stores is positive – they see it as a way to pay low prices for nice merchandise.  If I bought what looked like other people’s throwaways, they’d have different associations.  Also, they know that if I can’t find what they need there, I’ll buy it at a retail store, so I think that also affects their perception – it’s not like they have to take whatever I get them regardless of how they like it.

    As our children have gotten older, they have some things they’d like and they use their own money to buy those things.  If they really want something and I’m not inclined to buy it for them, then they can get it themselves.  They work for their money and they’re allowed to use it as they see fit. But sometimes I put limits on this – for example, sometimes on our shopping day one particular child will request to buy junk food with his money.  I don’t mind if he gets a small amount, but just because he’s willing to pay wouldn’t make me more likely to get  processed breakfast cereals than if I was footing the bill – I just don’t see it as beneficial.

    I understand that feeling of wishing you could give your kids more when you run up against a financial limitation.  Generally I feel like we can give our kids most of what they want and need, but sometimes we can’t and I feel a tug when I say ‘no’ to something I want to say ‘yes’ to.  As my kids get older, I’ve run into more of these situations.  I think that’s where the struggle is, when we feel we’re depriving our children because we just don’t have enough, that they really are deprived.  I said above that I’ve taught my kids to differentiate between wants and needs, and sometimes I have to remind myself about this.  Otherwise, we parents can always find something to feel guilty about!

    Avivah

  • Keeping Purim costs down

    Holiday costs very easily spiral out of control, and like all other holidays, a person can enjoy the spirit of things without unnecessarily spending lots of money.  So I thought I’d share a little about some ways I keep Purim related expenses in check.  Some of these ideas will help you now; some require advance planning and can be put into use at different times of the year.

    Mishloach manos – (also called shalach manos, this is the gift of food that is traditionally given on Purim to friends) – I set a limit of $1 for each family shalach manos (the kids send their own and my budget for them is lower).  Lest you think this looks cheap and chintzy because of my low budget, you’re wrong.  I actually have to be careful not to make it too nice because I  don’t want anyone to feel outdone, which is why I lowered my price from $2 to $1.  I know how little I spend, but most people wouldn’t be able to accurately guess by looking at it.  This price range allows me to send nice foods while keeping it simple – and it doesn’t overwhelm anyone.

    We really enjoy preparing and giving mishloach manos (I try to keep the main list to thirty, and with the kids friends it goes up to fifty or so), so it’s not a pressure for us.  For some people, they might be best off by significantly cutting down the amount of people they give to.  As you see, we don’t spend huge sums of money that would make this financially stressful.

    Food – Keeping food costs down is typical of my food saving strategies – make homemade foods, buy packaged foods in advance when they are on sale, buy at discount stores, etc.  This year I’ll be sending two sets of mishloach manos.  One will contain a half pint of homemade (home canned) salsa with a  7.5 oz bag of Garden of Eatin’ organic blue corn chips.  I bought a few cases of the chips when a store heavily discounted them to move them fast – .50 per bag (usually they’re several dollars each).  The salsa was made with tomatoes that I bought for $3 per case, tomatillos that I got free, and ended up a very nominal cost.

    The second set of mishloach manos include organic chocolate bars, natural strawberry kiwi juice boxes, and 5 homemade sugar cookies that spell out Purim in Hebrew.  Again, I bought the chocolate and juice boxes when I saw them heavily discounted.  I don’t wait until a few days before Purim to start thinking about it.  The chocolate and juice were bought six weeks in advance, the chips were bought ten weeks in advance; all of these purchases were included in my regular monthly grocery budget.  My monthly food budget always includes any holiday expenses, which is nice since it keeps my financial outlay in that area constant.

    Containers – The canning jars I’m sending the salsa in I bought in August 2008 for $1.30 a dozen (they were new and I shared about how I did that here – look halfway down the post).  So each brand new jar, including the lid and ring, cost me about .12 cents. If I were to buy a dozen jars new right now, it would be at least $6/.50 a jar.

    After Christmas, I bought all of the non-seasonally themed candy gift boxes that were available at clearance prices, 75% off.  So I paid .25 cents for each one.  I didn’t know what I’d be sending for Purim and if this would be the right size, but figured better to buy it and have them than to regret not having them later on – it turns out that these will be a little small for my needs this year so they’ll be stored for next year.  I bought nice sized gift bags that were 75% off after Valentines Day that are large enough to fit the salsa and chips.  Those were also .25 each.

    The second mishloach manos is wrapped in cellophane we were given a couple of years ago by someone cleaning out their basement – they gave us a number of unused rolls because they didn’t want to store something they wouldn’t be using until the following year.  The kids are all very good at being creative with what we have.  I was out of ribbon to tie the cellophane up with, so we found a roll of thin black string, and then the kids used the thin threads of tinsel (the kind you use as metallic ‘grass’ at bottom of baskets) to tie on top of the string to make it look more festive.  I had gone to Trader Joe’s with my toddler the day we prepared these, and got a few helium balloons while we were shopping.  Some of the older kids snipped off lengths of the ribbon it was tied with to wrap theirs with.  🙂

    When I send gift bags, I don’t write on the labels, so that the person receiving it can save it for future gift giving if they so choose.  Gift bags are expensive and it’s a shame for them to only get used once, don’t you think?  It won’t surprise you that I save the containers we receive on Purim. 🙂  I let the kids choose from these throughout the year when they need to take something to a birthday part, and the following Purim they can choose from those containers to send mishloach manos to their friends.

    As I mentioned yesterday, the kids made a lot of containers this year, so they didn’t take much from what I was stored in the Purim box (they used mostly card stock and paper plates).  If you learn to look at containers that are already coming into your house with an alternative idea in mind, you’ll see lots of free containers that you can use.  For example, the little plastic baskets that cherry tomatoes come in, the lidded microwaveable containers that some frozen vegetables come in, foam containers that one local grocery packages their discounted vegetables in – there are so many choices.  When I bought pearl onions that came in a small purple net bag, I saved them.  You can recycle jars or cans, then decorate them for this purpose.    The kids did this last year for Chanuka food gifts to our parents (one example was when they layered dried beans in glass jars, added spice bags and instructions for cooking).  You get the idea!

    Costumes – I’ve made a number of costumes from cheaply purchased clothing at the thrift store.  Sometimes I buy it to use as is, sometimes I buy it for the fabric.  I’ve purchased elegant used formal wear made of nice fabrics like silk, taffeta, and velvet evening gowns (if there’s a stain somewhere on it you can get these very cheaply), taken the item apart, and then resewn it into dress up gowns for girls, and king costumes (jacket/cape with pantaloons) for boys.  I once bought a blue cotton sheet to make a prairie girl’s dress, and the bonnet and matching apron came from a old cotton robe that was checked red and white.  Costumes are fun to sew because it doesn’t matter if they are perfect, and your kids will think you’re incredible just by whipping together something basic. You can also buy costumes at the thrift store after Halloween, or buy them new when they are deeply discounted after Halloween.  I can’t usually go to yard sales because my dh takes our vehicle to work on Sundays, but I have gotten some nice costumes for the littles in the past (lion, Tweety bird, horse) for just a dollar or two.  Don’t forget to ask friends if they have something you can borrow before running out to buy something.  We’ve rarely spent more than a few dollars at the very most for a costume.

    Seuda – (festive Purim meal) – I’ve been flabbergasted by how much people spend on this.  Last year we spent $15 for 13 people.  That was the first time we had a dairy meal for Purim, but it was very nice and everyone enjoyed it.  We had homemade challah rolls with butter, thick vegetable soup, homemade pizza (equal to about three or four pies), chevre (goat cheese), cottage cheese, roasted potatoes and yams with rosemary, and a big fresh salad.  And we put out orange juice and milk to drink, in addition to water.  For dessert we had banana chocolate chip cake, chocolate cake (both cakes were from shalach manos), and rice pudding.

    This year I was thinking I’d be hard pressed to beat that price, particularly since this year we’ll be having a family of 9, in addition to our family of 11, and then our three parents as well (23 people total).  But you don’t have to keep it to less than $1 a person for it to be very affordable.    Providentially,  tonight my dh came home and told me a friend wants to empty his freezer in preparation for Pesach (Passover) and give us three pans of food from his daughter’s wedding – meatballs, chicken, and a cooked vegetable dish.  This is really nice food, and since I also want to empty my freezer for Pesach, this will be used for our Purim meal.  🙂

    Remember an important mitzva of the day is to give charity to those in need that at least equals what you spend on mishloach manos.  This is above and beyond regular tithing, and it’s not the place to cut costs!

    Avivah

  • Taking advantage of vegetable bargains

    I think I’ve hit my personal record for buying a huge amount of food for a tiny amount of money and if you’ve been reading here a while, you know that’s saying something.  I spent $45.63 at one store on Wednesday, which included but wasn’t limited to: 4 cases of tomatoes (28 lb each), 7 cases of yams (40 lb each), 19 heads of celery, 150 lb potatoes, and a case of bananas (40 lb).   To be honest, I did have a store credit of $24 from the two cases of yams I bought last month that spoiled in a very short time, so the total would have been a little more had I not had the credit. But I was quite pleased with it.

    Note: if you buy something and there’s a problem with it, don’t assume it’s your fault.  I knew that something was wrong when the yams went off so fast (I’ve been buying in bulk and storing in bulk for a couple of years now and this was unprecedented in cold weather), but at first I assumed I’d have to swallow the loss – the store I bought the yams last month from was far away from my home, I no longer had the receipt, and I wasn’t able to return until five weeks after the original purchase.  But I’ve learned it doesn’t hurt to ask, and when I called and explained to them the date I bought them, how I stored them, and what happened, they readily agreed to refund the entire price whenever I’d be back in their area, without having to show any proof of purchase.  It took about five minutes to make the call and get the person in charge on the phone; $24 for five minutes ‘work’ is pretty decent, don’t you think?

    Along with my wonderful windfalls came a lot of work!   People often think I’m just lucky that I find so many things so inexpensively, but the truth is that most people walk right past these kind of deals and don’t recognize the opportunity in front of them.  Or even if they realize the price is really low, they don’t know what to do with such huge quantities without it spoiling before they use it.  I never let a concern about quantities stop me from buying (as you see from the fact I bought almost 300 lb of yams :)), I figure somehow I’ll find something to do with it! 😆

    The tomatoes were super cheap because they were very, very ripe.  So I had to process them right away.  That meant that I (along with my kids) spent a solid chunk of time yesterday washing, chopping, cooking, and canning.   Was it worth it?  I think so.  We made 15 quarts of tomato sauce, 12 quarts of salsa, and 5 quarts of tomato juice.  Pretty good, since the ingredients for all of it didn’t cost more than $15!  (My kids wanted to know why I didn’t buy all of the cases available at this price.)  It’s a nice feeling of satisfaction at the end of a day to see the counter filled with beautiful jars of home canned foods.  And I like knowing that my kids are developing an attitude of self sufficiency as well as learning real life skills like preserving foods.

    I was considering canning the celery but to do that I’d have had to pressure can it.  Though if you look at the actual processing time, pressure canning looks faster than water bath canning, it doesn’t take into account the time needed to bring the canner up to pressure, process the food, then wait for the canner to depressurize before moving on to the next batch. That can add up to an hour to each load.  Since I wanted to get about 80+pounds of tomatoes dealt with in one day (saved some to use fresh), I decided to only can what I could water bath and the celery ended up being dehydrated instead.  Dehydrating celery is so easy – just slice it thinly and put it on the trays.  But it’s honestly almost disheartening to watch sixteen heads of celery becoming so compact that they fit into a quart sized jar – and there’s still room left in the jar!

    I’m planning to can a bunch of the yams, since they’re in beautiful condition now but they won’t stay that way forever.  But I won’t get to that until next week, since there’s no rush.  Then I’ll have them in a ready to use form to add to soups, stews, or casseroles.

    The bananas were very ripe (had lots brown flecks on them but weren’t turning black), but my kids attacked them so I doubt there will be enough left by Sunday to even consider turning into fruit leather.  Bananas make great snacks since they’re so filling, especially when spread with lots of peanut butter.

    An additional frugal perk of canning in the winter is that you really appreciate the added warmth from the hours of cooking and steamy smells wafting throughout the house.

    (This post is part of Frugal Fridays.)

    Avivah

  • Delicious Cabbage Soup

    Cabbage is a wonderful winter vegetable – it’s inexpensive, stores well in a cool room, and can be made into a huge variety of tasty dishes.  I created this soup a couple of days ago, and though I thought the twelve quarts I made would be enough for two lunch meals, it got gobbled up at one sitting!  The amounts below should work well for a smaller family than ours  – I made about three times this amount.

    Delicious Cabbage Soup

    • 2 medium onions, chopped
    • 2 – 3 cloves of garlic, diced
    • 2 – 4 T. oil (I used rendered chicken fat)
    • 1 – 2 lb leftover turkey or whatever meat you have from making broth (you can use ground meat instead if you don’t have any leftover meat to use up)
    • 1 large head of cabbage (purple or white)
    • 1 T. sweet paprika
    • 2 t. thyme
    • 8 c. broth
    • salt to taste

    Heat the oil in a pot, and add the chopped onions; cook until translucent.  Add the soup chicken and saute it until it’s warmed through.  Then add the cabbage, spices, and broth.  Cover the pot and cook on medium until the cabbage is so soft it’s almost melting.  Taste it and add salt according to your personal taste – I’d estimate I used about 3 T. sea salt for my large pot full (12 quarts).

    This recipe is super inexpensive and it’s a great way to use up your leftover chicken from making broth.  The cost for me to make 12 quarts was under $5: the onions were .29 lb (I used approximately two pounds – .60), the cabbage was .39 lb (I used about 8 – 10 lb/3.90), and since I got the turkey carcasses for free, the broth and turkey were free.  It’s packed with flavor and nutrients, and is very digestible.  Perfect to warm you up on a cold winter day!

    (This post is part of Pennywise Platter Thursday and Ultimate Recipe Swap.)

    Avivah