Monthly Archives: July 2018

Chickpea Pot Pie (gluten free)

menu plans, recipes

Sorry it’s taken me longer than intended to get this post up – I wrote it up last week and thought I scheduled it to post at that time, but obviously I made a misstep with that.

But tasty frugal and filling recipes are useful any time of the year!  This is dairy free and gluten free! When I make this, I usually double or triple the recipe and put a couple of pans in the freezer for future meals. It reheats nicely.

Chickpea Pot Pie

  • 1 large onion, chopped
  • I carrot diced
  • 3 T. oil
  • 2 c. diced butternut squash
  • 2 c. cooked chickpeas (also called garbanzo beans)
  • 1/4 c. frozen peas
  • 1 T. cumin
  • 1/2 t. tumeric
  • 1/2 can coconut milk
  • 3 T. potato starch
  • salt, pepper to taste

Dough:

  • 2 sweet potatoes or white potatoes, mashed
  • 1/2 c. gluten free flour
  • salt

Saute the onion and carrot in the oil until golden. Into the same pot, add in the chickpeas, green peas and butternut squash. Cook until all vegetables are soft. Mix up the potato starch, cumin, coconut milk, salt and pepper – stir into the boiling vegetable mixture and stir very well until there is thick sauce.

Pour this mixture into a baking pan.

Next, mix the mashed potatoes with the flour and salt. Spread this mixture on top of the vegetable mix in the pan. Bake at 350 degrees until the top is golden.

Serve hot!

Avivah

Now the plumbing work begins

frugal strategies, homemaking, parenting

The main wall is down, the secondary wall is down but this is just the beginning of turning our boys bedroom into a kitchen!

Today was the first part of the next stage – having the plumbing and gas lines wired in. We also are having additional electric outlets put in.

It’s been a very loud and messy day and I’m so happy that I made arrangements for ds6 and ds18months to be at a camp for this period! They would have been so stressed and frightened of all the noise of the jackhammer and banging, not to mention that an active work zone isn’t a safe place for young children.

Overview of the new kitchen in progress - day 1
Overview of the new kitchen in progress

When I first considered this project, I thought we’d have to move the water lines from the current kitchen across the main living area and through the new kitchen area. Then I wondered if perhaps we could connect it to the bathroom plumbing, which I was told was possible.

The bathroom and laundry room
The bathroom and laundry room – replumbed; gas and water lines also added

That seemed a lot more convenient, but we’d still have to rip up the floor across our home in order to put in a new gas line.

Then ds10 suggested we hook up the new gas lines to our laundry room gas outlet – brilliant! It didn’t occur to me at all  – that boy saved us so much time and work with his idea. So while we’ll need to replace the laundry room and bathroom floor, most of the floor that isn’t in the active work zone will remain intact.

Here’s the hallway leading from the bathroom on the left to the new kitchen area on the right. The new plumbing lines are at the top, the new electric lines are lower down.

renovation - hallway

Now you can see the new kitchen area – there is plumbing for two sinks (red and blue piping); the yellow piping contains the new gas line. To the right you can see the drilled space for one of the new outlets.

renovation - boys room

Obviously there’s nothing left of this as a bedroom for the boys anymore! We moved their bunkbeds (the ones we built almost two years ago) temporarily into the living room and moved the rest of the living room furniture out onto the porch. Good thing we have a large porch!

Three boys sleeping in their relocated bunks
Three boys sound asleep in their relocated bunks in living room

For day two, hopefully the electric outlets will be finished being installed and the plumbing will be completed. I’m planning to take the younger five boys on a day trip to the farm on Kibbutz Chafetz Chaim while this work continues in our absence, but need to make sure the boys’ closet unit is emptied before we leave. I knew we’d need to move it eventually but had hoped to be able to leave it in place a bit longer to minimize the upheaval and having even more stuff not in its place.

For now things are very much in flux and while it’s a necessary part of the process, it’s definitely disconcerting to have so much mess with so many things out of place.

Progress, progress! It’s true in the physical world and it’s true in the physical world that before things improve, they get a lot messier and more uncomfortable first!

Avivah

And let the wall come down – demolition fun for the boys!

frugal strategies, homeschooling, parenting

After weeks of mentally working through lots of details to see if my renovation brainstorm was doable or not, our newest project has begun!

I’ve been thinking and thinking how to increase the size of our main living area. While at 30 meters it’s a nice size for an Israeli apartment, it doesn’t feel especially spacious as our family continues to expand! I’ve had several ideas about how to maximize our  living space but vetoed them because all cost a LOT of money. But my latest idea actually seemed like a real possibility!

Here’s the idea: my younger boys’ room is behind a shared wall with the living room. For a while I’d been thinking of knocking this wall down once my youngest daughter gets married, and then moving the boys into her room. But since she’s only 17 marriage isn’t on the agenda for a while and in any case, that plan would mean I would lose a bedroom, which I really don’t want to do.

But…if I knock down that wall, and then turn the boys room into an open kitchen (and the kitchen into the boys room), the main area gets bigger, we don’t lose a bedroom, and the space becomes used much more efficiently.

The current kitchen is perfectly sized for a bedroom, while the boys bedroom is a large, awkwardly shaped room. It doesn’t have any direct light – all light comes from the enclosed patio off of it that is basically useless for anything other than storage – who wants to walk through a bedroom to get there? By opening up this wall, the light in that room and the air flow in the main area become significantly better.

Turning a bedroom into a kitchen and a kitchen into a bedroom is a big project. The plan is to keep the costs down by hiring out the the skilled work such as plumbing, electricity and laying gas lines, then doing all the rest ourselves. During my researching stage, it seems that just about everyone I mentioned my idea to was skeptical about our do-it-yourself intentions, which would be disheartening if I listened to all of those voices!

I’m going to be reusing the cabinets from the kitchen that we put in three years ago, which are really good quality and I’ve been very happy with them. One big question I have is about using the caeserstone countertops again or not. They were so expensive and would be workable in the new kitchen but I didn’t love how they looked then and after three years still don’t like how they look!  (I’m thinking very seriously of building our own laminate countertops but am concerned about running out of time before I can finish them.)

After all this thinking, the project has begun! The boys moved the set of bookcases that were on the wall I wanted to demolish – the plan was to clear the area so our handy man could take it down, but once it was clear they were disappointed that they weren’t going to ‘get a crack at it’. I then agreed to let them take a few swings at it using the heavy hammers I bought them the day before (I had them remove tiling along the base of the walls to prepare for retiling those areas). After all, doesn’t that sound like a good healthy outlet? (I did go over safety precautions and repeatedly told them ‘safety first’!)

I didn’t think they would make a dent in a concrete block wall. After all, this is physically very strenuous work; professionals would bring it down using a power saw that made strategic cuts in the wall and then a full sized sledgehammer (which my kids would hardly be able to lift, let along swing!)

I went out to do errands and came back an hour later to find two holes in the wall. It was so exciting for them and for me, too! I wish I had been able to get pictures of the entire process.

They kept at it the next day for hour after hour until they had the entire wall down.

Ds9
Ds9 – after this picture was taken they finished taking down the wall to the left

This was far from an easy task! The wall was mostly concrete block but at some point they ran into a huge horizontal pillar of solid concrete reinforced with rebar that spanned the length of the wall. I told them to hold off on knocking it down until I clarified if it was safe to remove it. I had already checked that the wall wasn’t a supporting wall, but what I saw led me to think that this was some kind of structural element.

Ds12 swinging on the final piece of rebar enforced cement
Ds12 swinging on the final piece of rebar enforced cement

I asked our handyman about it and he said it’s structural for the wall itself, not for the building, and safe to remove. Safe, but it was an insane amount of work.

Who did it, you may be wondering? Ds9, ds10, ds12, and ds16 helped out as well. They seriously know how to work, these boys! Not only did they do the demo using only hand held hammers, but they shoveled hundreds of pounds of broken concrete to load the containers for the construction waste removal company to remove. (So far we’re up to six full huge heavy duty ‘bags’ – here in Israel this quantity is known as a balla. It’s a LOT.)

We also decided to take down a small wall that separates the living room from the hallway. That wall creates some privacy but it also cuts off some usable space in the living room and we have a different idea of how to keep the privacy while opening up the space. That wall was a much easier job, since it was drywall.

Ds10 pounding a hole into the drywall
Ds10 pounding a hole into the drywall
Ds6 getting into the action!
Ds6 getting into the action, banging away at the wall!

This has been an empowering and enjoyable project for the boys, albeit exhausting! There’s something about doing a significant task and really putting yourself into it that builds up a child (and an adult, too!).

Avivah

 

How to get kids to eat beans

frugal strategies, homemaking, parenting

Whenever I post a weekly menu plan, there’s always someone who asks (and lot more people who are thinking!), ‘how do you get your kids to eat beans?? My kids would never touch that!”

Here are some tips that work for us:

a) When I add in ‘special’ or protein elements to a bean dish, that adds to the appeal. Hence a lentil salad would be ‘meh’, but when feta cheese is chopped up into the same salad it will be greeted with ‘yum!’ Chickpeas cooked with vegetables is kind of boring, but with a peanut sauce mixed in, much more appealing! Same thing with the burritos – by adding a little bit of shredded cheese to some beans and rice, it gets a significantly more positive reception.

b) The form the beans are served with also matters – bean stews are seen as blah by my kids, but if I make the same mixture into a burger or loaf, it gets gobbled up.

c) I usually add meat or chicken gravy or stock into the bean dishes that I cook to add a rich depth of flavor to the dish. I always save the gravy from roasted chicken for this purpose.

d) It’s not enough to make the bean dish look and taste good if you have the attitude that your kids will probably hate it! They pick up on that and respond accordingly.

Realize that beans are a kind of boring food – they don’t have much flavor on their own and need to be seasoned well. It’s also CRITICAL that they are cooked until completely soft. It is yuck to eat beans that are underdone and even a tiny bit of a crunch to them or even that mealy texture when they’re just cooked but not really soft!

There’s no way to get kids used to eating any kind of food without giving them opportunities to have them!  If one attempt isn’t successful, it doesn’t mean they’ll hate all beans – it means you need to find a different recipe!  My kids have grown up eating bean dishes and as a result, even without integrating any of the tips above, will eat them willingly. I can’t tell you they wouldn’t prefer hamburgers (so would I!) but beans are a staple in our pantry.

Avivah

Menu Plan – week of the Nine Days

frugal strategies, menu plans,

I was woken up by an early morning phone call by a friend inviting me to take a walk, and since Rafael also woke up from the ringing of the phone, I decided to take her up on it. I popped him into the stroller, had a pleasant morning walk, and then after getting home, made breakfast for everyone and by 9:30 am was able to sit down to plan the menu for the coming week.

There are weeks that I don’t plan my menu in advance, and though things always run more smoothly when I do, when it comes to the Nine Days things don’t go well at all if I don’t pre-plan. That’s because some of my quickie meals like baked chicken aren’t an option to fall back on this week, and vegetarian themed meals take more planning.

At least half of our meals during the week usually include chicken, so completely meatless meals are a significant shift for us.

Here’s our plan for the coming week.

Sunday: lunch – oat walnut burgers; dinner – vegetarian stuffed potatoes (toppings: sauteed onions and garlic, black beans, diced tomatoes, shredded cheese, sour cream)

Monday: l – lemony lentil salad with feta cheese; d – falafel, yogurt

Tuesday: l – tuna patties, potatoes; d – sweet potato chili, cornbread (gluten free)

Wednesday: l – tuna pasta salad (I make two versions – one has rice noodles for those who are gluten free); d – chickpea pot pie (will post recipe in a day or so)

Thursday: l – bean/rice/cheese burritos (I plan to have the kids make the tortillas since they enjoy that kind of thing); d – chickpea peanut stew

I currently have three large pans soaking: one filled with lentils, one with red beans, and one with chickpeas. Every couple of weeks I soak and cook a large amount of two or three kinds of legumes and pop them in the freezer in meal sized portions that can then be easily defrosted for quick use.

——————–

On a different note, for the first time in a long time I made yogurt! My kids like having yogurt for Shabbos breakfast (along with cornflakes, granola and milk) and when I saw 2 liter containers of milk for 6.90, decided to do some yogurt making. Since I hadn’t made it in so long, I wasn’t sure how it would turn out. In fact when I froze part of the large batch that I made, I learned that it’s not something to do in the future – it completely changed the consistency!

I simplified the instructions I posted years ago in How to Make Yogurt. I used one small container of yogurt for the starter for four liters of milk, then covered the heated pot of milk with starter well and left it on the counter overnight. (Look at that post for details of the process so that these changes will make sense.) That was it! Since the weather is warm, there was no need to put it in the dehydrator or cooler to keep it warm.

Speaking of the dehydrator, that’s something else we’ve pulled out for the first time in years! I took it out with the intent to dehydrate chicken for my daughter and son-in-law to take on their two month trip to Thailand (they left this past week). Unfortunately, the fuse for the transformer blew right before I started and I couldn’t get to the store to buy a new fuse in time to prepare the chicken for them.

I bought a bunch of nectarines on sale and some were starting to get soft; I told the kids they could use those along with some overripe mangos to make breakfast shakes which they very happily did. Since the dehydrator was already out, ds12 then asked me if he could make fruit leather. I told him to go ahead and blend up the fruit, then spread it smoothly on the silicon sheets and put it in the dehydrator. He made a delicious batch of fruit leather with it – it’s so empowering for kids to see that they can make things like this on their own!

In other news, I’m planning an ambitious home renovation project. I’ve been thinking about how to do it frugally (of course!) and with minimum disruption to our family.  Thinking about all the pieces of this project has taken a huge amount of head space but I’m bit by bit putting the mental pieces together. We plan to begin the day after Tisha B’v, in just one week. More about what I want to do and why in another post!

Avivah

Why do I want my son to attend gan safa?

homeschooling, parenting, Trisomy 21

First of all, the exciting news is in – Yirmi has officially been accepted to gan safa!

“Do you mind sharing a little bit more about how and why you decided to put Yirmi into the school system and not to homeschool him at this point?”

When it comes to homeschooling, there’s what I want to do and then there’s what I  actually do. If the two lined up, Yirmi would continue homeschooling.

There are two things that currently concern me: 1) acquisition of Hebrew language and 2) acquisition of friends.

I live in RBS, the largest English speaking community in Israel. It has some wonderful unique features that make living here a pleasure; the flip side is that as a homeschooler Hebrew is something I need to work to expose my kids to, and I’m not finding this easy to do. The most effective way to learn Hebrew is by being in a Hebrew speaking environment and having Hebrew speaking peers. I’m not providing that.

Secondly, though Yirmi enjoys playing with his brothers and their friends who come over on most days, he doesn’t regularly play with friends his age. This isn’t because there is a lack of kids around or because he doesn’t play appropriately (he does), but because I don’t get him out in the afternoons. I’m not regularly setting up the playdates that mothers have invited him to, I’m not getting out to the park  – while I’m not beating myself up for this, I’m being honest about my limitations because our kids need us to be honest about what we can really do, and to find alternatives if we can’t do it.

After years of being the mom who took her kids everywhere, who took her kids to the friends they were invited to (since most mothers would rather invite kids over than go out), who after moving to Israel took her kids to the park daily for years… I’m tired. And while I’d like to have more energy to take him out daily, I don’t.

“Can you share why you prefer gan safa to special ed?”

While gan safa is officially part of the special ed framework, in my area it is filled with typical kids who have language challenges of some sort.  (It’s not coincidental that our sizeable English speaking population has a high number of kids in gan safa – in other areas I’ve been told that gan safa is filled with kids with significantly more learning challenges.)  Kids who are cognitively more limited are put into a different gan system (gan ‘pigur’); kids with autism are put into yet a different system (gan tikshoret).

I’d like Yirmi to participate in an inclusive environment as much as possible. With the law that just passed here in Israel, I don’t know if it will be realistic anymore once he gets into grade school.  It will unquestionably be much, much more difficult than it has been for kids with special needs until now, and it hasn’t been a walk in the park for any of them even with favorable laws to work with. We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it. But at least for now, he can benefit from a mainstream environment.

I’ve been asked why I don’t want to put him into the typical gan classroom. Going into school will be a huge transition. When taking into account not yet speaking Hebrew and having expressive language delays, it would be overwhelming for Yirmi to be in a class of 35 kids. I think all kids benefit from being in a smaller class environment, and gan safa is usually a class of about 12 kids with three teachers. Honestly, I think all kids would do best in an environment as supportive as this, but certainly it sounds like the best fit for him at this time, when taking into account the various options.

I don’t have any information on the specifics of the gan yet, but hopefully this will be a wonderful new experience for Yirmi!

Avivah

 

 

Becoming the squeaky wheel for the sake of my child

parenting, Trisomy 21

It’s a busy 3 week period for our family – a new grandchild, my oldest son’s first anniversary, my son turning 16, our 26th anniversary, today Yirmi turned 6 and in two days my oldest will turn 25!

I started the morning by getting the super good news that Yirmi was accepted to gan safa (kindergarten with a language focus). (I mentioned a month ago that I had a lot of conflict about this decision and have gone back and forth for months about if I really want to put him into the school system. I decided that if he was accepted, it would be beneficial for him.) It’s been a couple of months since I met with the committee; I called several weeks ago to verify his placement and was told he probably would be placed in gan safa. But, she added, call again in a week to confirm.

So I tried to call again. And again. And again. This office is notoriously difficult to get hold of. Yesterday someone answered and told me to call the secretary of the person in charge of placements. I called her repeatedly. It went to voicemail every time.

So this morning when the head of the health clinic asked what was happening and offered to call using the personal cell number of the person I was trying to reach, I was happy to accede to her offer! And very delighted when I got the good news that he has been accepted and things are in place for him academically for the coming year.

Why, I wondered to myself, was I so worried? ‘You see, Avivah,’ I said to myself, ‘everything doesn’t have to be so hard. You were worried for nothing.’

Several hours later I got a call from someone from the office of special education in the city who after spitting out her name rapid fire, wanted to know where my children attend school. When I told her they were homeschooled, she asked about our religious affiliation. I told her I wanted to know her reasons for asking before sharing any of that information. She refused and after I refused again, she told me it’s about Yirmi’s kindergarten (gan) placement.

I knew it.

Call me paranoid, but telling them my religious affiliation was a trap that I wasn’t falling for. Here’s why. If I tell them that we’re charedi, they’ll tell me no charedi gan safa will take children with Down syndrome. If I tell them that we’re dati leumi, they’ll tell me they’re full and don’t have room, or that the dati leumi schools won’t accept him since we’re charedi (they already tried this tact in our face to face discussion).

So I told her we’re in the middle and either choice would be fine for us, that what matters most to me is that he’s in a framework that appropriately meets his needs. She really wasn’t happy with my answer.

She asked for the name of the school that my high schooler attends, the better to pin a religious label on us. I couldn’t help but laugh at the perplexed silence following my answer, because it’s a middle of the road school and it didn’t help her put us in the box. “Oh, so you really are in the middle”, she responded slowly.

So much for my happiness and relief of the morning to know his school placement had been finalized. No, she said very definitively, Yirmi absolutely hasn’t been placed in gan safa and no one was authorized to tell anyone about his placement and don’t you know all the classes are full already? And lest you think I can’t hear between the lines, it means too full for a child with T21.  Their lack of space really isn’t a compelling argument to me, since I gave in my application very early (ie before most other parents). While this year there are honestly a larger than usual number of applicants to gan safa, ‘lack of space’ simply means they’re giving the spaces to kids they view as highest priority.

It would be really nice to feel that those in charge of making these educational decisions care about my child.  I don’t have that confidence. After all, they’ve never seen him. (Knowing that putting him in an inclusive school environment means that I’ll be spending the next 13 or so years of my life fighting for his basic educational needs to be met has been a huge part of my conflict about putting Yirmi into the school system versus continuing to homeschool him. Maybe, I’ve wondered, I should save my energy to spend on educating him myself and we’ll all come out ahead?) I suspect their decisions are mostly about funding.

I don’t like to use my energy in a negative way and I’d really prefer not to expend so much energy in advocacy, but it’s all about being the squeaky wheel if you’re a parent of a child with special needs – unless you want to put him in the special ed framework. And things just got a lot harder today, when a law passed in Israel that removes additional funding for a child with special needs who is in an inclusive educational framework; they will now get the same funding as any other student.

(Here’s how that works and why it is so damaging – a child can be successfully included when he receives extra supports to be successful in the mainstream classroom. Take away the extra supports and he will fall behind and will then have to be placed in a special ed setting. Where his school will then receive full funding for him.)

On a more positive note, today we were offered a slot for a new speech therapist to work with Yirmi. (The first therapist didn’t feel she was making progress with him and that he’d do better with a therapist who had more experience working with children with T21. He was then put on the waiting list for the more experienced therapist.) When I say we were offered a slot, that sounds rather magical, doesn’t it? What it actually means is that I repeatedly approached them and told them it wasn’t acceptable for an extended period to go by while we waited for his name to reach the top of the priority list again.) I did again this morning when the director was there, and she pushed him to the top of the list right then. The squeaky wheel gets greased.

On another lovely note, we celebrated Yirmi’s sixth birthday with a barbeque dinner with family and friends. (After closely observing ds9’s birthday party, he was very clear about what he wanted! He requested a specific menu and went in person to invite a couple of neighbors to attend.)

He’s growing up so much. There have been concerns over the years that have disappeared, and others that I still have that I need to remind myself to take a long term view on and not get uptight about. And even more than that, not to blame myself for not having done more (because that’s the road I go down…) – like that he’s not reading yet because I wasn’t consistent enough. (The irony is that the two brothers ahead of him are both very late readers and I never had this guilt with them!)

I often marvel at Yirmi’s depth of sensitivity to the feelings of others and love seeing his full-hearted acceptance and love of those who are in his life. He loves learning and is always ready to go on an outing or have a new experience. He’s a great kid and continues to enrich our family!

Avivah