>>How do you keep going when it is so very painful to exist in this world? I rarely share my problems. I always feel like other people probably have it worse. What keeps you going? If you have any wisdom for me, I’m all ears.<<

This weekend I received this question, and though I’ve composed a private message with more specifics to the writer, I realize this is a question a lot of people may have now, so I’m sharing the general part of my response here.

In the past I’ve shared the beliefs that have helped me get through hard times, and today I’ll expand on that with a practical tool that has been transformative for me.

Gratitude – The darker and more difficult times are, the more critical it is to look for the things to feel grateful for. I keep a notebook of things that I appreciate. This isn’t an academic exercise to get it down on paper and go on with my day! I use it as an anchor to focus and reflect on.

As I think about the positive things, I try to really feel how good each of those things are. I consciously fill my mind with all that is good and going right. When I start to go off track into negative thoughts, I pull my thoughts back to the good. The more I can do this, the happier and more content I feel.

This is really important because if you don’t consciously fill your mind with positive thoughts, fear and anxiety and negativity will flood you. That’s the natural default we are all societally set at. (You can see this very much right now in the news, on social media and just about every single place you visit online or in person.)

Activating your gratitude practice is definitely a mental exercise! The more you do it, the easier it gets and the more you do it, the better life feels. The better you feel about life, the more things in your life will shift for the good. The challenge is to feel good even before the external circumstances look good, because this is what brings more good into your life.

This might seem too simple, too pat – but gratitude is a powerful practice that will shift your perspective even while things are tough, and improve your life as time goes on. I can’t stress enough how powerful this can be.

Avivah