I recently took my 11 yo dd to the doctor for a well child visit, necessary because I needed to have the doctor fill out paperwork for summer camp.  (Last year I decided at the very last minute to send the two oldest and it was very hectic – this year I’m getting everything done well in advance.)   Generally I only take the kids to the doctor if something is wrong, and even that is very infrequent. 

Things have changed a lot from when I was a kid and went to the doctor.  The doctor would ask me how I felt, look into my eyes and ears, listen to my heart, and take my pulse.  After being weighed and measured for height, that was it.  Now all of that is part of a well child visit, but there’s lots more.  Lots of questions for the child – it was like an interview.  If I had known to expect all of that, I would have told dd about it so it wouldn’t have caught her unaware.  She wasn’t expecting to sit there for so long, answering questions like – do you smoke?  Do you buckle your seatbelt?  Do you eat healthy foods?  What are healthy foods?  Do you listen to your mother?  What subjects do you learn?  What extracurricular activities are you involved in? Do you play with matches?  Do you play with water?  What would you do if a stranger approached you?  Do you have guns in your home?  And on, and on, and on.  These are all things that I’ve taught them about, so there wasn’t any information that I hadn’t discussed with them.  But I don’t think it’s a doctor’s place to ask all of these questions – it smacks of Big Brother and governmental intrusion to me. 

Obviously the board of pediatrics has determined that parents aren’t doing a good enough job of teaching their children about healthy living, so now it’s their job to do it.  As a parent, I resent this attitude.  If I want to know about gun safety, I’ll take my kids to the experts.  If I want to know about nutrition, I’ll go to those who have training.  I found it especially ironic that a doctor who knows much less than my daughter about nutrition was telling her what to eat.  I’m not minimizing doctors – our pediatrician is wonderful. But nutritional training for doctors is a very tiny part of their training, and most doctors aren’t paragons of health.  I’ve often found it ironic how many nurses and doctors are visibly unhealthy, but they continue to tell everyone else how to stay healthy.

And what is equally frustrating is that if you question the necessity of this protocol, it makes them suspicious that you are a neglectful parent.  After all, why should a responsible and caring parent mind if a doctor takes the time to ‘educate’ their child about important issues?  But it’s not education, it’s more like screening parents through the answers their children give.  It makes me wonder how often doctors feel the need to notify child protective services when the answers aren’t to their liking. 

Dd found it a waste of time, and so did I (I found it downright annoying and frustrating, since the doc and I got into a discussion about the supposed benefits of specific vaccines, a topic I try to avoid unless directly asked about it), but the paperwork is signed and that’s what we needed – a simple statement that she was healthy enough to participate in camp activities. 

Avivah