It has been a wonderfully busy and full and happy season of wedding preparations, of hosting and shopping and planning and preparing – and this week the sheva brachos for our second daughter has ended.

I was reflecting on how nice it is to have this time to see the new couple each evening, and how valuable it is to have this week to ease the transition for both the new couple and their families. It’s been so nice to have the opportunity to get to know the family members of each of our sons-in-law. And of course, it’s extremely nice to hear wonderful things being said about the new couple (and their families :)).

One person told me after attending the first sheva brachos that we hosted that he never was at a sheva brachos where he was repeatedly close to tears. I asked him why, and he told me that he was touched by how much love was expressed by our children for one another when each of them spoke. I was very touched by his appreciation – it helps me to not take their connection with one another for granted.

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People have been asking me in the last couple of days if now that the weddings are over I’m resting and taking it easy.

Well, not exactly. I do still have a number of other people in our family who have needs to tend to! It’s actually quite a list right now of things that very much need my attention – I’ll spare you the list – and that’s before taking into account any Pesach preparations!

In any case, it will take a while to process the changes but I think everyone is transitioning well to our new normal. I’m keeping my eye on ds5; we spent time every day for three months preparing him for this because he’s very close to his big sisters and I was concerned them moving out would be a significant trauma for him. He’s been very out of sorts since the second wedding and it’s hard to know how much is being overtired and out of his usual routine. I’m positive that missing his sisters is a big part of it.

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This past Shabbos we hosted sheva brachos in our home for Friday night dinner and shalosh seudos; friends hosted the lunch meal. I’ll share the menu for those of you who may find that helpful!

I did something very wise and hired my younger boys (11, 10 and 8) to be the waiters. About noon on Friday I told them I had limited people I would hire and was offering each of them the possibility of waitering. To have the option of being a waiter, they needed to be dressed for Shabbos and have their room clean by 3 pm, in addition to the other tasks I had asked them to do earlier in the day. Obviously they needed to do what they were asked before and during the meals promptly and with a good attitude.

I made a master list so ds11 would know what to do when (I made him head waiter and later gave him a tip for taking more responsibility) and took a few minutes to go over the basic run down of what to expect. My goal was to sit and enjoy the meal, and though I definitely was needed to facilitate the courses, for the most part the boys did the bulk of the work – they did a great job with smiling faces the whole night long! Afterwards they told me it was fun being a waiter. 🙂 And they were all very happy with their payment, which came out to less than 100 shekels

Here is the menu plan!

Friday night:

• rolls
• dips – chumus, techina, spicy Moroccan carrot salad
• olives, pickles

First course:

• baked carp with pesto topping
• mayonnaise

(I was very nervous about this since I never make fish for Friday nights, and was worried about keeping it warm until it was served without it drying out. I baked it only 10 – 15 minutes, leaving it half baked. Then I put it in the oven to warm up and left it there until it was time to serve it. I was worried it would be undercooked or dried out and was so relieved when I opened the pan that it was just right!)

Soup course:

• chicken soup

Main course:

• roasted sweet potatoes with cinnamon and ginger
• sesame broccoli
• green beans with honey-tahini glaze
• roasted eggplant, zucchini and onion
• rice
• roast chicken
• chicken breast in coconut tomato sauce
• salad – lettuce/cherry tomatoes/peppers/cukes

Dessert:

• trifle cups – whipped cream and chocolate mousse topping brownies and white cake
• baked sliced apples
• peanut butter coconut flour cake
• coconut flour bundt cake topped with coconut cream and blueberries

Shalosh seudos/third meal:

• rolls
• dips – chummus, fresh tomato dip, Turkish salad, eggplant dip
• baked carp
• salads – pineapple coleslaw, sushi salad, Moroccan carrot salad, eggplant halves drizzled with techina, purple cabbage salad with almonds and red pepper, lettuce tomato salad, tomato salad
• cakes – assortment of bakery cakes

I probably am forgetting something since there was a lot of food!

We hosted dinner in our living room, which was cozy, and then had shalosh seudos on our large porch, which had more space. My husband preferred to have people sitting closer together in the beginning to give more of a feeling of togetherness and getting to know one another. It worked out really nicely!

We were called by the daughter of a long term friend of my husband, who is in seminary this year and asked about coming this week for Shabbos with a couple of friends. I really didn’t want to say no, but my husband I agreed that we all need a quiet Shabbos this week. It will definitely be much quieter than it’s been lately, with only the youngest six boys at home; we’ll have a simple menu and hopefully some time to rest!

Avivah