Quite some time ago, ds13 decided he wanted to learn shechita, and made arrangements independently to study the related halachos (Biblical guidelines and laws) with a local shochet (ritual slaughterer). Once learned, they have to be reviewed thoroughly every thirty days.
Over the past months, he has assisted in processing a number of animals – chickens, ducks, goats, sheep, and even cows. But he had yet to perform the shechita himself.
A month ago, he came home and told me someone was selling a turkey for just 150 shekels, and asked if I was interested in buying it? No, I absolutely did not want a turkey walking around our yard and told him so. “No, not to raise – for me to shecht!” The shochet he learned with him determined that he was ready to do the shechita (kosher slaughtering) himself.
The process went very smoothly – the shochet told me it’s rare for a first shechita to go so well, and that it’s been a pleasure to learn with ds13, due to his diligence and how seriously he’s taken his studies.
It was very gratifying for all of us to see the tangible results of his months of study! Ds13 plucked it, cleaned it and kashered it himself, and we saved it to enjoy together with dd24 and her husband when they were here for the weekend.
A couple of days ago someone came by and said there were a couple of ducks he was having shechted, and my thirteen year old could watch if he wanted.
I went over just as they finished up, and found out that my son hadn’t watched but actually performed the shechita on both of them! (Under the supervision of the shochet that he studied with, obviously.) He learned firsthand why ducks are considered one of the more difficult animals to shecht. One of the two was kosher, one wasn’t, and the person who the ducks belonged to insisted ds13 take half of the meat.
It was a mallard duck and small to begin with, so half of it wasn’t a huge meal, but nonetheless, this week we had roast duck on the menu. 🙂
My husband and I have great satisfaction in observing the emergent developmental process – in this case, watching ds13 develop and pursue an interest. No degree of external manipulation or incentivization can get the results that come from intrinsic motivation. (Our foster care social worker, who visits monthly, is very appreciative of ds13 and his activities, though she said she finds it discouraging to see the contrast with her own son, who is lacking any visible signs of emergence. I’ve spoken to her about supporting the natural developmental process, too!)
Some people have said it’s good he has a skill that could potentially be a career – that’s true and it’s always good to have options, but I wouldn’t want him to do this for a living. I value it greatly as a life skill, however.
For me, the biggest value is a person learning to listen to his own inner guidance and move towards that. This is way of thinking that could dramatically enhance the life satisfaction of every one of us, but far too many of us adults, under the guise of being responsible, have lost the ability to recognize and respond to the inner promptings of their souls. And what are we here for, if not to live lives of meaning and satisfaction?
Avivah
When is his birthday? It would be really cool to find out if he is a ‘fire’ sign. That would make a lot of sense.
I had to look this up in order to answer! He’s an earth sign, a Virgo. It was really interesting to look up his exact birthdate and read the description – it completely described him. Thank you for the question and expanding my knowledge, and welcome!
That is such an interesting choice of hobby 🙂 I guess he’s really not squeamish. My daughter who recently had a bas mitzvah has been working on her writing skills for the past couple of years – she writes all the time. She has written short stories, novel length stories, interviews and put out newspapers for the family .
I really appreciate the fact that she’s developing her interests on her own! I just feel like sometimes it’s not balanced enough, and I need to make sure she spends time on other interests as well. But this is her main focus. It’s a tough balance, not sure how much I should be involved in her spare time activities.
He actually is sensitive and doesn’t like the actual shechita part. It’s very quick, though, and he knows this has to happen; it’s balanced by his appreciation that the animals live very good lives until their last moments, versus the factory system.
The thing about interests is that it when it’s a passion, it doesn’t look balanced. And that’s really fine. In my opinion, they have balance with the rest of their daily activities. They can explore this stage to their hearts’ content; maybe this will be a lifelong interest and maybe it will pass. (Writing is likely to be a long term interest.) I remember when my oldest was completely into baseball cards – I wasn’t happy about that particular fascination, but another homeschooling mom told me she wished her child would have some passion and that helped me to look at it differently, to let go of the negative perception and embrace the positive. And he learned a lot from that one interest – tons of math, statistics and history.
For my thirteen year old, shechita is a practical skill to develop – it’s not a passion or even a hobby.
Hi, I really enjoy your blog and your various insights into life and child rearing. I was curious as to how your encourage internal motivation in children?